What if children were worth a million dollars?

I have seven children, all under the age of 11.  At home, I feel indescribably happy and blessed, and yet, well, normal.  When I go out in public, I am suddenly reminded of just how abnormal I am in this day and age.  People look at me like I have seven heads rather than seven children.  Yes, some people are nice and some people are just amazed.  But many, I will dare to say most, people make it very clear:  children are NOT valued in our culture.  On the contrary, they are seen as burdens and bothers.

Recently as my little parade was going up and down the aisles of the grocery store, I was taking in each face around me as we went past.  I was wondering what their faces would look like if instead of children, I was surrounded by things of great value:  nice clothes, an expensive handbag, precious jewelry, the keys to a luxury sports car in the parking lot to drive me home to my fabulous well-staffed mansion?  What if even they themselves were stacks of money equalling to millions of dollars?  Would they look down on me then?  Would they feel sorry for me or think me irresponsible or crazy?

The problem here is that society has everything backward.  They think children are something we need wealth to afford.  Children drain the wealth that we have.  Children are of so little value that thousands are killed every DAY.  The view that we are blessed if we can afford children is completely opposite of the biblical view that children ARE blessing.  Children don't drain our wealth, children ARE our wealth!  Don't believe me?  Read the Old Testament.  In the Old Testament, offspring was the highest form of blessing God bestowed on the nations He blessed.  They were greatly desired and valued because they were the future.  The people had a generational, long-term view of offspring that we rarely think about these days.  All we think of now is ourselves and the here-and-now.

What if my children were worth a million dollars?  How would people look at me then?  Well, guess what.  They ARE worth FAR more than a million dollars.  They are worth more than any price tag you could put on them.  They are priceless.  They are people, precious eternal souls, the only thing in the world that matters.  They are future adults, spouses, parents, grandparents.  They are brothers, sisters, friends.  How can any material thing be worth more than that?

I remember once I heard Jim Bob Duggar say each of his children were worth more than a trillion dollars and he felt like the richest man in the world.

I couldn't agree more.

Another child. What could be better?

As I anxiously await the arrival of my seventh baby, my second little girl, I feel her quickly-growing body squirm and kick within mine. Waiting to meet her, to hold her in my arms and smell her sweet newborn-scent is almost too much--much harder than being a child waiting for Christmas.

I think about how rare a seventh child is, how blessed I am that I will have her in my life. I wonder, what could possibly replace the joy this child will bring? What could I possibly desire to have instead of her? What would I have if she had not come that would make her absence worth it?

More money?
More room in my house? A cleaner house? A quieter house?
More time for myself?
More freedom to go where I want, do what I want, or even do what I need to do with more ease?
A thinner body with less stretch marks?
Nine months of my life free of morning sickness, fatigue, and discomforts?
More sleep?
More acceptance from others?
More "peace" and less stress?
Less responsibility?

Of course, all of these things combined could never come close to even compare to my child. How could I ever choose these temporary pleasures over the eternal treasures that a baby would bring?

Another child does not take time away from the children I have. But she will indescribably enrich the time we all have together. And any time I have alone with each child is special, precious, and treasured--even if it must be carefully planned for.

Another child does not force me to divide my love into even smaller doses. The love in my heart is only multiplied--each child I have only increases the capacity of love my heart can hold. Each child is loved as if he were the only one, cherished to the point of tears, so much I would give my very life for any of them in a heartbeat. And the thought of losing even one is unbearable.

Another child does not take away from my ministry to others. My children expand my ministry--together we are more hands, more feet, more hearts, more love, more power. And besides that, they ARE my ministry.

Another child does not take me away from or hinder my relationship with Christ. Nothing has caused me to grow closer to Him, to depend on Him more, to see my need for Him more, to be more thankful to Him than my children. Nothing has forced me to lose my self to gain more of Him than my children. And nothing has shown me more about what true joy, true life, true blessing is all about more than His gift of my children.

Yes, I cannot wait to meet this new little blessing from the Lord. Neither can my husband and children. I know I will never regret her. I know she will bring us greater joy and happiness than we can even imagine right now. I know I would never trade her for anything else this world tells me I need to be happy. God is making her, God knew her before she was conceived, God has a plan for her. The world may stare in shock at her, may even say she should not be. But He calls her a blessing and I know that is what she is.

It's a...

This was me before I went for my 20 week ultrasound today.

And this is what I came home with...

We're having another girl! I am SO happy and thankful to God for this gift.

Just can't stop talking about the blessing of children!

The past few days I have been reading back through my old blogs--this one, the one before it on Xanga, and the one even before it I had forgotten about on Homeschool Blogger. It was so wonderful to look back and read about all the memories and thoughts I had forgotten. That really is the purpose of my blog--to keep a record of my life, my thoughts, my ideas--my online journal that I have chosen to let others read. I don't see it as a means of trying to teach others or convince them to agree with me. It's just an outlet for me and turns out to be a record of years past that I can look back on.

In recent times I have gotten a little weak about sharing things I know many people will disagree with. I have been confronted quite a bit and I do NOT like confrontation or debate! However, this is my blog, my journal, my thoughts, so I've decided that I shouldn't be afraid.

With that said, I want to share something I shared WAY back in 2006 when I had 3 tiny children. I haven't read these quotes in years so I totally forgot them, but I LOVE them!

First I shared this quote from Dr. B. H. Shadduck:

"If people want to limit the size of their families, they should wait until their child is two years old and then decide whether to kill the child. There would be very little limiting of families, you may be sure, on that basis.

Nearly every child is its own proof that it had a right to be born. The love and joy and pride that come from a child proves that God was giving an infinite blessing when the child was given, and that it would have been a foolish sin committed against their own happiness for the father and mother to have prevented the conception of that little one which later turns out to be so precious.

Every reason for one child is a reason for other children. If one child brings happiness, more children bring more happiness.”

After that I added my own thoughts:

"When I look at each of my precious boys I shudder to think of what if they had never been? If I followed the typical way of the world, none of them would be here! What a dreadful dreadful thought! And along that same line of thought–if and when God chooses to bless us again (or again and again!) I will one day look at that child and think the same thing. I will look into that precious face which is that of an eternal soul and say, “HOW did I ever live without you, my little treasure?” Oh, nothing causes me to praise God more than my children. They truly are the greatest blessings He gives. By far. By far."

Now I am expecting my seventh child and still wholeheartedly agree! Now I know 3 of those precious faces I talked about and KNOW that what I said was true! I will meet another precious face in May and I know I will also look at him or her (we find out tomorrow!) and once again say, "HOW did I ever live without you, my little treausre???"

The new translation of Psalm 127

Sometimes I wonder when the bible got changed to...

Children are a burden resulting from our own actions;
The fruit of the womb is the consequence of our own irresponsibility.
Like arrows in the hand of a fool are the children born in one's youth--
Overwhelmed and unfortunate is the man that has his quiver too full of them.
They should be ashamed, and will just look like idiots to their enemies at the gate.

Psalm 127:3-5 New Worldly Translation

Don't you?

I Love My Life!

I just read this post I wrote in 2009 and it reminded me of what a wonderful life I have! I forgot about it, but I sure needed to read it!


I am so in awe that God would see fit to give me a life that is everything I have ever dreamed of and that I get to do everything that I love and love everything that I do! If you are looking for someone to gripe with about being "stuck at home" with kids and cooking and cleaning and laundry or to whine about the agony of pregnancy or the toil of caring for babies, you have come to the wrong place! I LOVE my life!

I get to be pregnant, which is the most wonderful state for a woman to be in, not once or twice, but many times! I get to give birth naturally because I want to because it is the most amazing thing I have ever experienced. I get to breastfeed my babies as much as and as often as and as long as I want because I get to stay with my baby 24 hours a day!

I get to play with cute clothes and adorable cloth diapers and beautiful baby carriers and call it "taking care of the baby"! I get to snuggle with the most delicious fat rolls and inhale the most fragrant breath you can imagine all day and all night long.

I get to hang out with the people I love more than anything, having fun and loving and learning all day long and call it "mothering".

I get to snuggle on the couch with them and read books and learn amazing new things every day WITH them and call it "homeschooling"!

I get to blast music and sing at the top of my lungs and dance around the house with the children with our list of chores and call it "cleaning".

I get to do fun experiments in the kitchen, and sometimes my helper and I will pretend we're on the Food Network, and call it "cooking".

I get to pop my delicious baby in a sling, put 2 more gorgeous blondies in a stroller, and walk behind 2 other amazing kids on bikes, and breathe in the evening air and the company of my family and call it "exercise".

At night I get to sit in front of the TV and watch a few of my favorite shows I've DVRed and call it "folding laundry".

At the end of the day I get to curl up in bed with a huge stack of books and call it "research and higher learning".

I also get to curl up in that same bed and feel the warmth and comfort and security and happiness and joy of cuddling up to my husband's sleeping body and call it "marriage".

I cannot even imagine a better life! I can't wait till tomorrow to do it all again!

Seven from Heaven

I guess I somehow forgot to post here that we are having a baby! #7 is on it's way and due in May. I'm 13 weeks today and judging by my growth and having a very rough first trimester, everything seems to be well, but tomorrow is my first prenatal visit and it's always a relief to a mommy's mind to hear that little heartbeat. I'm so grateful to God and excited to have seven children. It seems so perfect. I jokingly say that we will be Jen and Kevin Plus Seven ;)

Seventh
by Jennifer Wilson

I know I'm number seven,
but the fact you can't deny
is that God, Almighty Giver,
is the Author of my life.

My soul is no less special,
and my spirit no less great
than those that came before me--
be they one, or six, or eight!

So many eyes are blinded
by the whispers of this world--
to them, there is no miracle
in a human life unfurled.

A baby's just a plaything,
a burden, or a chore,
and we must proceed with caution
to prevent too many more!

Only a fool would trust the Lord
to give as He desires
and live a life of trust in Him...
whatever that requires.

A new car may be exciting;
a new house may be a prize,
but my new life is better
than any thing that money buys.

So all the world may roll their eyes
when seven now they see--
But I can't wait until I meet
the "fools" who welcome me.

Mother's Prayer

MOTHER’S PRAYER
By Serene Allison

Oh, child of mine
The Giver of life has given you to me
And oh child of mine
The pages of your life we’re yet to read
There’s only so much
I can do in the time He gives a mother

Chorus:
Seek Him, and find Him
Fall fervently in love with Jesus
Trust Him, and serve Him
Live every breath for what He teaches
Then He’ll be close when I’m no longer there
That’s your mother’s prayer

Oh, child of mine
There are so many beautiful dreams I have for you
But oh, child of mine
My greatest desire is for you to know the truth
Whatever you’ll be, maybe a poet or a teacher or a king
Will all be in vain
Unless your friend is the one who died on the tree
(chorus)

Bridge:
Seek Him, and find Him
Seek Him, and find Him
Seek Him, won’t you seek Him and find Him

Embracing Life

Today I came across an old post of Beverly's and wanted to repost it here. In case you don't know, Beverly is my aunt who raised me. She passed away in 2007 from cancer much too soon, but her legacy still lives on in so many ways. She was an amazing woman of God.

She wrote this post right after I found out I was pregnant with my fourth child. She died only months after that fourth child was born. How I wish she could have seen all the beautiful blessings I have now, especially little Cara Grace Beverly, my little girl we used to dream about together. I know she would be so happy.

What do we say when we find out that some one is expecting a baby? Well, you might say, it depends? Well let me say right off that this someone is married. Does that help you? Now it seems that if the person is married, then we would be rejoicing in that new life. Right? Well, not necessarily. I am going to make some generalizations here, but I am only sharing what I have witnessed in my own life. If the couple has been married at least 2 years, preferably 3, and if this is their first child, then most everyone is excited. Well, if they are having financial problems then maybe some hold back from rejoicing. But for the most part, most people are glad to hear that a married couple who has waited a sufficient amount of time are starting a family.

How about the next child? Well, it seems again that if the couple has waited the right amount of time, maybe 3 years, then again most everyone is glad to hear that the next child is on the way. Now, I am truly going to get controversial. What about a 3rd child? Whew! Well that is different. But, if the first 2 children are the same sex, then most people will go along with trying for that 3rd in hopes that the couple finally has that boy (or girl). But, after three, then you are standing on shaky ground.

Have you ever thought about the message we are sending as Christians when we scorn life that God has created? Scorn life, you say. I would never do that. Well, I have heard it done over and over in my life, and sometimes I wonder whether Christians really think about what they are saying. For example, suppose the couple is expecting their first child only 10 months after marriage. What comment do we hear then? Well I can tell you what I heard (because that happened to us), and it was "Was this PLANNED??" The clear message is that no one would ever plan to have a child so soon after marriage. Or, how about this? Suppose the 2nd (or 3rd) child is due before the previous baby's first birthday. That is not really accepted now days either, unless of course you make it clear to everyone that this was an "oops" baby. Then people might forgive you and feel sorry for you. By the time you are expecting the 5th, or 6th, or scandalously the 10th, then many in the church either think that you are off your rocker, don't know what causes babies, are a saint, or are so rich that you can buy everything all these children want.

We need to be so careful about accepting the world's view of children. On one hand, we are taking a stand against abortion, as well we should. Then on the other hand, we are being critical of married couples who are having children, if they don't do it according to society's standard of 2, maybe 3 children, appropriately spaced of course.

I want to tell you about a 25 year old woman. This woman has been married for 5 years, and she just found out that she is expecting, her fourth. She already has a 4 year old, a 2 year old, and her youngest just turned 1 in September. Now tell me, would most Christians rejoice at the news of another life. Oh friends, I fear that they would not. But I know this woman, very well as a matter of fact. She is my beloved niece, who we raised as our own daughter. And let me tell you, she is rejoicing. The reality of another blessing from God, another life to embrace, another person to raise to love and serve God, another plate at their table, another baby to hold, more memories to treasure, all of these things and more cause Jennifer to behold the awesome blessing of being entrusted with another person to raise for Him. She is not thinking at all how she will buy designer jeans for all those kids, how she will be able to give them all their own room, how she will drive them to all of their lessons when they get older, or how they will pay for college. She knows that whatever God plans for each child, then He will provide. She doesn't have to be able to figure out all the details of this child's life right now; all she needs to do is know is that this child is from God.

I don't want to sound holier than thou because I have 6 children. Oh no, that is not my point at all. Your family size is a something that is between you and God. But, each one of us need to examine our attitude, and before God make sure that we are not accepting the world's view instead of God's. I can testify to you, there is great peace in looking around your table and knowing that exactly who God wanted is sitting there.

Sons are a heritage from the Lord, children a reward from Him. Like arrows in the hands of a warrior are sons born in one's youth. Blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them. They will not be put to shame when they contend with their enemies in the gate. Psalms 127:3-5

Why would I turn down a blessing or a reward?

Beverly Daffron

How a joyful mother answers the people at Walmart

The other day as I was getting my six children and myself ready for our weekly grocery shopping trip, I was mentally preparing myself for the usual onslaught of questions, comments, and stares. "How shall I answer today?" I contemplated. "Nice, polite, and sweet? Sarcastic? Jokingly? Referring to God?" I take many approaches and it gets interesting. But then it struck me. I have never asked God how I should respond. So I did. "Lord, what should I say to all these people? Some are nice, some are shocked, some are downright rude and disgusting. How would You have me answer in a way that glorifies You?"

Nothing came to me that day so I just went on with business as usual. I told people I was lucky, that God had blessed me, that I loved my life, etc. Then yesterday it came to me. "Praise the Lord." I praise the Lord for my children every day, so why not praise the Lord for them then too? Yes, that could answer almost everything:

Are they all yours? Yes, praise the Lord!

You have your hands full! Yes, I do--praise the Lord!

How do you do it? Praise the Lord--I couldn't do it without Him!

Even.... Don't you know what causes that? Why yes I do--praise the Lord!

I realized that praising the Lord is the perfect answer. It gives God the glory for my precious children and it lets people know that I believe they are blessings from Him.

Last night as I was going to bed and smiling about my new answer, a line from a song suddenly popped into my head. "He makes the barren woman become a joyful mother, and the home she lives in is filled with laughter, so praise ye the Lord." Then I remembered Psalm 113:9.

He makes the barren woman abide in the house as a joyful mother of children. Praise the LORD!

WOW! Not only is that the perfect answer, but it is how God WANTS us to respond to this blessing of abiding in our homes as joyful mothers! As we fix our eyes on Him and His Word, our natural response to this calling should be PRAISE THE LORD!

After God brought that verse to my mind, I knew this was His answer to me. How should I respond? With praise to the Lord!


JOYFUL MOTHER
By Pearl Barrett and Serene Allison

Hannah knelt before the Lord
Her lips moved with the anguish of her soul
Grant me my desire Lord
Give to me a son that I can hold
She never stopped asking for her miracle
God was faithful, He remembered her

Chorus:
He makes the barren woman
Become a joyful mother
And the home she lives in
Is filled with laughter so praise ye the Lord

It seemed to be impossible
Sarah wondered how this could be true
God had promised she would be
A mother, but her years had passed too soon
But there’s a perfect timing to God’s plan
The King of Kings would come through her Son
(Chorus)
Bridge:
Who is like the Lord our God who dwells on high
Who humbles Himself to behold
The things on Heaven and on earth.

Top 10 things not to say to a mom

There are more, but these are my personal top 10.

Some of these things are fine if they are honest questions coming from a friend. But if you see a mom in the store or any other public place that you don't know, please do not say these things!

1. You have your hands full. You've got your hands full.

2. Are they all yours? They're not all yours all they? I know those aren't all yours. I hope those aren't all yours. Surely them ain't all yers.

3. How do you do it? I don't know how you do it. I don't see how you do it.

4. Bless your heart. Love your heart. God bless/love your heart. (while shaking head in pity.)

5. You're crazy. You must be crazy. I'd lose my mind.

6. Shhhhhhoooh (while rolling eyes)

7. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6...

8. You poor thing. I feel so sorry for you. Poor you.

9. You're brave. You must be so patient. You're supermom.

10. Are you done yet? Are you going to have more? Are you planning to have more? Do you want more?

Lord of all, or not at all

This is a repost from August 2006. My third baby Isaiah is now 5 and my sixth baby Tyson is now the almost-11-month old. To be honest, it was easy for me to trust God in having more babies because they are my greatest joy and delight and I long for more! Now my faith is tested in that I am having to trust Him in the opposite situation:the possibility of never having more. This is where I really have to remind myself--He is STILL Lord of all, He is STILL in control, He is STILL on the throne. I can trust Him with this just like I always have.


August 11, 2006

Today my baby Isaiah is 11 months old. I seriously can't believe how fast this year has flown. David was only 10 months old when I became pregnant with Isaiah, so now there is officially a longer break before I have my next baby. Most people would probably say, "Your next baby?! Your youngest IS still a baby--and he's your third in three years!" But you'd only say that if you didn't know me Anyone who knows me knows that my not being pregnant yet is not good news OR bad news. If I found out tomorrow that I was I would be absolutely thrilled. And even though there are days I long to be expecting another son or my first daughter, I will be just as happy if my womb remains barren for three more years. Because I trust God's perfect timing.

So although I announce my non-pregnant state thus far with a bit of relief that I'm over the hump of "too soon", what I'm truly amazed by is God's never failing presence in my life. Although I've technically been able to become pregnant for at least six months now, my womb has not been opened because it is God who opens and closes it and it is not His time.

I am so at peace with this area of my life because I've given it over to Him. After all, shouldn't we give every area of our lives over to Him? We never have to worry about "trying" or preventing--we just LIVE and love whatever God brings our way. What freedom and joy! I will never have any regrets. You will never visit a nursing home and hear old ladies say, "I wish I'd never had those last two children. They were just too much on me." No! It's unthinkable. But I'm sure you'll hear MANY ladies lament, "IF ONLY I'd had more children." But I will never have to live with those regrets. I will always know I had the perfect number of children. No more. No less.

Who knows? God may be done with my womb. Three may be it for me. But I truly hope there are many more waiting in the wings for us. I imagine myself at my 90th birthday party, surrounded by maybe a dozen children, scores of grandchildren, hundreds of great-grandchildren, and the beginnings of countless great-great-grandchildren, and looking around at what the Lord has brought forth from our union. He started with two and from that came hundreds of His children, serving Him and doing great things in the world. What a legacy!

Among Christians there seems to be two belief systems. First there are those who believe that God created the universe, set it in motion, and left it to go it's course and let nature happen. It astounds me that any follower of Jesus Christ could think such a thing. Then there are those who believe that God is involved in our lives down to the last detail, that every second is orchestrated by His Divine Hand. I am among these. I've seen Him too much in my life not to know this. He's done and worked out way too many things--from the most life-changing things to the tiniest things that seem to not even matter. Since He loves us so much and is so involved, why not give it all up to Him? Why not entrust every detail of your life to His wisdom and love? In that total surrender is true joy, peace, and freedom. You will never find that in anything else--not in yourself or a loved one, not in material things, not in the pleasures this world seeks after, and not in drowning out life with things that confuse your mind. Only in giving it all to Him.

It's all about You.

It's all about You, Jesus.
All this is for You, for Your glory and Your fame.
It's not about me, as if You should do things my way.
You alone are God and I surrender to Your ways.



This has been my sing-all-day song lately; my sing through the mess and the noise and the chaos and the exhaustion song.
It's so easy for me to give into selfishness in the midst of these long hard days when I am constantly cleaning only to have it messed up,
constantly disciplining only for the same child to commit the same offense 30 seconds later,
constantly shushing only to have the noise level rise,
constantly cooking only to have it all gobbled up with nary a thank you, mom!
Constantly going going going and giving giving giving, and never a moment for me.
It sounds like a good way to forget about "me" but I find myself crying out "Me! Me! Me!" What about me? I need a break! I need quiet! I need something for me me me! WHY do I have all these little children? WHY am I keeping them here 24/7?

But then the Lord reminds me, life is not about me. My purpose in existing is not so I can live and die and have as much fun as I can and just enjoy life while I have it. My purpose is to serve and glorify Him. It's ALL. ABOUT. HIM.

I can think of no better way for the Lord to teach us unselfishness than through motherhood. Because of motherhood, I am all but forced to die to my self daily, to take up my cross, to deny my self.
The world wants to tell me everywhere I go that I am crazy because children are burdens, I need to have an easy life, I need the money children will take, I need what my flesh wants. Can no one see how selfish they look when the glare at me, shake their heads, point their fingers, make their condescending comments? I may be just as selfish, but my heart is crying out to them, "It's not about ME!"

It's all about You, Jesus.
All this is for You, everything I do all day, I offer it up to You as a sacrifice of praise, for Your glory and Your fame.
It's not about me. No matter how many times I lose my temper, lock myself in the bathroom, or think about giving up--I know it's not about me, as if You should do things my way!
You alone are God. I'm not God. You alone are God, and I surrender to Your ways.

Children are a Blessing

I am so excited to tell about this! I have a dear friend that I have known for about 15 years and she now has 10 beautiful children. They are just an amazing family and she has been one of my Titus 2 mentors, always faithful to counsel me and pray for me. They are the real deal! When she mentioned they were sending me a copy of a documentary they made called "Children are a Blessing" I was expecting a cute little home movie. Wow--was I surprised when I watched it. It is an incredible professionally made film, and as much as I was blown away by the quality, the content is what touched my heart and fueled my passion. This film could change your life.

From the description:

Children are a Blessing - DVD

A Family of Twelve Shares a Biblical Vision of Life

Produced by Moore Family Films

Watch this family of 12 enjoy family life together. See them in action as they anticipate, give birth to and welcome their 10^th child into the home.

You will hear them expose the history of the birth control movement on the 50^th anniversary of the Pill and how God opened their eyes to the blessing of children, in spite of their different ideals at the beginning.

It is a delightful documentary.

Not only will you be inspired, but you can show it to other families or lend out to promote the blessings of embracing children.

Includes 60 Minutes of Bonus Features

You can order "Children are a Blessing" from Above Rubies and it will be soon be available from the Moore's own website.

Is the Bible ALWAYS True?

I thought since I don't have much time to blog these days, I would move some things from my old blog over to here. This is something I wrote years ago--I'm a little older than that now ;-)
But four more children later, I believe what I said even more strongly than ever!


Today I overheard 2 SAHMS talking. All they did was complain about their children. They don't get any sleep. They never get to take a shower. They never get any time to themselves. They never get to go out with friends. Their children are so strong willed--NO method of discipline works. The children are so draining on their marriage. I hear this so often from moms and it saddens me.

These statements were actually said OUT LOUD:
"I love my children, I just don't LIKE them very much."
"I know she's a blessing, but she's a big burden, too."
"It's a sacrifice, but how much sacrifice is WORTH it?"

My heart was just breaking for these women. Is it really just my personality to love being a mother and making it my lifelong career and ministry? Is that why I feel they are missing out on so much blessing?

I whispered a prayer to somehow be able to minister to these ladies' hearts and perhaps help them catch God's vision for their families.

I am only 26 years old, but I feel that He might have me here as a representative of a woman whose heart is at home with her family. I would feel honored if He used me somehow in the life of some young mother who may be seeking to recognize her calling.

I was feeling somewhat similar 3 years ago when I only had 2 children. I wrote this email to Beverly:

First conversation last week. Talking to D, 38, mother to two girls age 4 and 1.

D: I don't want anymore, of course. Do you?

Me:Yes!

D: You do??

Me: Of course!

D: Well, I'm just too old.

Me: Well, my mom (I always refer to you as my mom) is 43 and desperately wants at least one more. (she already knew you had seven children.)

D: (Jaw hits floor hard) SHE does? Your MOM does?

Me: Of course. Why would you NOT want another precious baby?

D: (brief silence) Because! I'm tired! They cost money!

Second conversation last week. Talking to C, 30, mother of three girls around 10, 9, and 2. And L, 24, mother of two girls 3 and 2.

Me: C, whenever you want your baby seat back I will bring it. David doesn't really like it.

C: Well, there's no rush. We aren't having anymore. If we got really really blessed financially we might consider having one more. But only if it's before I turn 35. That's my limit.

L: Whew! No more for me! Do you want any more?

Me: Of course! I want a lot more.

Both laugh.

C: A lot! (thinking I am joking and or exaggerating)

Me: Yes. We believe children are the greatest blessing God gives.

Complete silence.

C and L: (In their minds) That poor stupid naive child.

L: (mumbling) only if insanity is a blessing.

These two conversations would have bothered me a lot a couple years ago. Now I only feel sorry for them. I've been thinking about their reasoning a lot this past week and last night as I got into bed these thoughts came to me.

The bible says children are a blessing. Whenever God blessed anyone in the bible, He blessed them with offspring! Is the bible true? Yes, so children MUST be a blessing. But is the Bible ALWAYS true? Any of these wonderful ladies would wholeheartedly agree, yes. So are children ALWAYS a blessing? We must further conclude, yes. But anytime they give any of these reasons they are essentially saying that children are a burden. Whether they realize it or not, they have bought into Satan's lie that children are a burden, not a blessing. Let's examine these reasons for not having children.

"I'm tired." "I couldn't handle more children." "I'm too old." Translation--children are a physical burden. But this is contrary to God's word. According to God, Children are a physical BLESSING! God gives grace for the moment. He will give you strength and energy when you need it. He will give you grace to handle every child He gives you. Children will keep you young. And they will be an extra blessing to you when you are REALLY old and really tired! You will stretch and grow in so many areas because you will HAVE to!

"They cost money!" "We can't afford any more children." Translation--children are a financial burden. Again, not according to God's Word. Are children always a blessing? Then children are a financial BLESSING! Don't you have a rich Father? Don't you truly believe that He will provide for His own? With each of my children I have seen a significant increase in financial blessing. Plus, having children makes you learn to be frugal and will keep you from being materialistic, thus SAVING you money and saving you from the sin of materialism.

"I would go insane." "I don't have enough patience." Translation--children are an emotional burden. No! Children are resoundingly an emotional BLESSING if you will start looking at them through God's eyes instead of the worlds! Please, start enjoying your children. Start seeing them as the tremendous blessing they are!

How I wish I could say all this to so many people. If they ask I will. But I can't convince them of anything. Only God can. I wish I could write something like this and hand it out to so many people. It breaks my heart that they are missing out of this wonderful life because they unknowingly believe these lies. They just don't KNOW. I pray one day they will.

Love, Jennifer

Happily married to Kevin, who is more than I deserve

Joyfully raising Justin and David for God's glory

Tell me what the world is saying today, and I'll tell you what the church will be saying seven years from now.

--Francis Schaeffer


Beverly's response to me:

"Two things:

GOOD FOR YOU!

and

ONE DAY I THINK YOU WILL WRITE THOSE THINGS FOR OTHERS TO READ."

You were right, Beverly. I did. Thank you for encouraging me to.

My Kids

I haven't blogged in so long, I thought I would give a quick update on each of my children. They are all growing up so fast! It makes me sad, but at the same time, I wouldn't trade who they are now for their younger selves either. They are each so unique and fun--it is such a joy to watch each of them develop into their own person with their own personalities and interests!

Justin is 8 now. He has always seemed so much older than he really is. He's so mature and smart and will do anything for you. I don't know what I would do without him. He is such an amazing help to me and never once have I gotten the impression that he resents a single thing he's asked to do. On the contrary, he's on the lookout for how he can help and wants to be a help. He just has that giving spirit. He's very into sports and video games, and although he wouldn't admit it, sometimes I find him hiding in a corner with a book too.

David turned 6 in February. He is the one who broke his arm and currently sports a cool blue cast. He broke it when he fell from a tree and that statement tells a lot about him. He is adventurous and brave. He'll try anything once. He's also the one who brings in various bugs and crawly things to show me. He recently decided to keep a caterpillar for a pet in a jar and although he supplied little Bob with an assortment of grass and leaves, he didn't last the night. David was pretty upset that Bob would never be a butterfly and now lets all the bugs live outside where they belong.

Isaiah is 4 and he is such a sweet little guy. He has always been very quiet, but I can tell a lot is going on in behind those blue eyes. He has the sweetest smile and a little dimple in each cheek. He loves to do school with his big brothers and has successfully worked his way though his preschool workbooks, but after a while he is just more interested in playing superheroes or building a robot out of Duplos.

Zachary is 2, but will be 3 next month. Zachary--oh Zachary! He is the child God gave me after I pridefully thought "I can do this mothering thing. It's not so hard! This child-training thing is easy!" When God heard that, He laughed and sent Zachary to teach me a lesson! Oh my, this child is a handful all on his own. He gets into everything and is mean just for the sake of meanness, is so strong-will that he laughs in the face of discipline, and is not scared of anything! He has the bumps, bruises, scars, and injured teeth to prove it. One minute he makes me tear out my hair and then next he's running to me with his arms open, saying just "Mommy!" just for the sake of saying it. And he is so sweet with his little sister and brother. There aren't many 2-year-olds out there that have both a little sister and a little brother, but he got the job and he's good at it. He might terrorize his older brothers, but you better not mess with the little ones with him around.

Cara Grace, my little princess and one and only baby girl, is already 18 months old. Oh she is a sweetheart and melts my heart all day long. I am so sad to realize how her babyness is slowly slipping away and she is becoming a big girl. She still sucks her thumb and has to have her blankie to do so. She has her big brothers wrapped around her little finger and they spoil her rotten. If Cara wants it, Cara gets it. They beg me to buy her what she wants in the store so that she won't cry. She was a daddy's girl before he left, and even though he's been gone three months, she still cries out "Daddy!" when she sees him on the webcam or hears his voice on the phone. She hasn't forgotten him at all.

Tyson is 2 months old. Already my tiny newborn is gone, but now I have a sweet baby who looks at me so adoringly and giggles and coos when I talk to him. He is such a sweet spirited baby! He sleeps all night, which I don't strive for, but I don't argue with either! He prefers his own bed but occasionally will sleep in with me in the mornings. He loves each one of his brothers and sister. It is amazing how even a baby knows his family. He sits in his swing and just watches everything that is going on like it is so captivating. Although he was born with hair, he is now quite bald except for one thick and long patch of hair right on his crown that I like to call his toupee. He is such a cutie!

Of course I believe that children are blessings whether you have 1 or 20, but I have to say that the more I have, the more blessed I feel! Each one that comes along is just so precious and so unique and brings something special to the family that only he could bring. The dynamics of a large family day to day is just an amazing thing--it is so hard for me to describe, I think only you mothers of large families will understand what I'm trying to say. It is hard to imagine when you haven't been there, but it just works. Children ARE a blessing from the Lord. The fruit of the womb IS a reward. Happy IS the man that has his quiver full of them! I just love my children so much it hurts. I feel so undeserving of them. They are amazing.

The birth of Tyson Jeremiah

For those of you who know me or have been reading my blog a long time, this birth story may come as a surprise to you. But even though this birth experience was quite different than my most recent previous ones, it was beautiful and blessed.

During the last few weeks of pregnancy, I had two nights of "false labor". One night at 38 weeks I had strong, real contractions that convinced me I was going to go early for the first time. Then they just stopped. Then again at 39 weeks, I called people and warned them to be prepared that night. Again, they stopped. So last Sunday morning when I woke up at 6am with hard painful contractions 15 minutes apart, I didn't get my hopes up. Ok, I did get my hopes up. I got up and got everything ready to go. By 9am they were 10 minutes apart. I was starting to have to stop and breathe through them. But since they were still so far apart, I got myself and everyone ready for church and headed out. I went on to church and told family today was the day. But I realized the contractions didn't hurt anymore and were slowing down. Then by noon, they were gone. Again. I was so frustrated! All this work seemingly for nothing!

After church I brought my brood on home, fed them lunch, and then joined them on the couch to watch movies and rest. I had contractions here and there but by that point, I just didn't want to pay attention anymore. Around 5 or 6 pm I noticed they were picking back up and by the children's bedtime I was in real pain again. I went on about my business and got ready for bed myself. I read for a while and started timing my contractions and saw they were back to a steady 1o minutes apart. I finally turned off the light and decided to try to get some sleep, but every time I would drift off, the pain would grip me again. Somehow I endured many of them in a state of semi-consciousness as I drifted in and out of sleep, but that didn't last for long. I was suddenly in unbearable pain and panicked when I realized that these babies were 3-5 minutes apart! At around 2am I hurriedly called my friends who were watching my children and my mother-in-law to come and get me quick!

When we got to the hospital at about 3:15am my doctor was waiting for me. She must have known I needed relief because she asked me if we were still doing everything the way we discussed. My answer: "Forget it all. Give me my epidural as soon as possible."

I had been going back and forth in my mind about whether or not I still wanted the natural birth I had been fighting for. With my husband gone (he's been gone almost three weeks now), I didn't think I was mentally prepared to handle it. I finally decided that I would make my decision whenever the time came, and when the time came there was no decision to be made. I had pretty much been in labor for the past 18 hours and now with my body engulfed in pain after pain, I knew I needed it to be over.

I still endured another half hour or so before the anesthesiologist was ready. I was 7 cm. I was so nervous about the epidural. I had them with my first two babies and I really hated them. I hated the sensation of the needle going into my back, I hated the numbness in my legs, I hated not being able to feel anything to push, I hated being immobile for a while afterward. I was reminding God of all these things I hated while at the same time begging Him to please make it work quick!

They got it put in and maybe it was because I had 3 contractions in the process, but I hardly felt it at all. After it was in I laid back onto the bed and, oh my, where did all that pain go? I instantly began to feel relief. My biggest complaint was now that my left foot was numb! I waited for that awful heaviness to take over my body, but it never did. I could still move my legs and my whole body, yet I could feel no pain. By the time I got to 9cm, I felt so relaxed and wonderful I wanted to take a nap. As I was lying there enjoying my rest and relaxation, I could slowly feel the sensation of the baby moving down a little every minute or so until finally I could feel the pressure of his head. I let my doctor know that I was ready to push and she said go for it. She had told me before that she wouldn't coach me--that she believed it was best to push whenever I felt the need to do so. Amazing for a doctor, right?! This was the first time I have not been coached when to push and I was amazed that with this epidural I could feel everything, yet it was painless. I could feel everything so clearly that I could tell exactly what to do. I pushed a couple times and the bag of water broke and splashed out! (This was also the first time I had not had my water broken.) After my water broke, the sensation was more intense, maybe a little painful, but just enough to be just what I needed to get this job done. At 7:16am, after a couple more pushes, his little body slid out all at once! My doctor scooped him up and immediately laid him on my chest while she did everything else. He was so perfect! And he was so big! And he had hair!

After a few minutes they weighed and measured him: 8 pounds 14 ounces and 21 1/2 inches. That's almost 9 pounds!! Then they handed him back to me and he nursed like a little vacuum for 2 hours.

God has blessed me once again with a perfect birth and a perfect baby. I feel so undeserving. The past few days of being home with all my children have been full of the grace of God. It has been peaceful and joyful and an amazing blessing. Well-meaning people have asked me over and over, "Do you have help? Do you have help?" I know they just can't imagine being alone with six small children and a new baby. But, oh, I do have Help! I have all the Help I could ever need or want or ask for. "Blessed is he whose help is the God of Jacob, whose hope is in the Lord his God." Ps. 146:5. Blessed indeed!


About his name
Early on when we were discussing names, my husband suggested Titus. I loved the name, but our last name is Thomas, and Titus Thomas was just too much of a tongue twister for me. But after that I just could not get that "Ty" sound out of my head. I went over every Ty name I could find. Once my husband said, "How about Tyson?" I said, "No! That's chicken! That's Mike Tyson!" But something about it stuck with me until I just had that feeling when I heard it, that that was "it". Tyson. It was suddenly so cute and endearing and I was in love with it.

Tyson means "firebrand". I had to look up that word in the dictionary, but it means, "a person who kindles strife or encourages unrest; an agitator; troublemaker. A person who stirs up trouble or kindles a revolt." When I first read that I thought, No way! I can't name my baby that! But as I thought about it in the context of a man on fire for Jesus, I got excited. A "firebrand" for Jesus is a whole other thing!

Jeremiah means "God will raise up". So put together, his name means "A firebrand God will raise up." Wow! Being given that name in these times is exciting for me! My prayer for Tyson Jeremiah is that he will grow to be a man on fire for the Lord, a man willing to kindle strife, encourage unrest, stir up trouble, or start a revolt in the name of Jesus Christ if he has to!

Tyson Jeremiah Thomas
8 lb. 14 oz. 21.5 in.
February 22, 2010
7:16 am

Brats or Blessings?

I wanted to pop in from my blogging absence to share my experience at the hair salon today. I got a pretty good cut, but the color turned out much too light--but that's not what I wanted to talk about.

The theme of my otherwise glorious 2.5 hour sit in the salon chair seemed to be "kids are unwanted brats". Everything around me seemed to shout of the world's negative attitude toward children. First, my stylist's friend stopped by for a chat along with her adorable little girl who I would guess was 2-years-old. The little girl was beautiful and did nothing the whole time but sit angelically in her stroller eating a Christmas cookie. Her mother tried hard not to pay a bit of attention to her--she was busy. And every time the little girl made an attempt to talk to her mother with things such as "I'm done, Mommy" while trying to hand her her napkin, mommy would scowl and start talking about what a brat she was and how she wanted to leave her with her daddy, but daddy wouldn't watch her. Anytime anyone walking by would even acknowledge the little girl, the mother would roll her eyes. "Shhhhhew! She is such a BRAT. I'm giving her away--do you want her? Take her!" Yes, I know she was joking about that, but she didn't sound like she was. I was so sad for the little girl to have to sit and listen to her mommy say nothing but bad things about her constantly. And I wouldn't doubt that after hearing it long enough, she will start believing it and start living up to that wonderful name her mother calls her. BRAT.

After a while of listening to her go on about how horrible her child was, the girl doing my hair snickered and whispered to me "She only has one." Hearing her, the girl said to me, "Oh, you have one too?" I smiled as I lifted up the cape to reveal my very large belly and said, "I'm about to have my sixth." Her response was probably the most shocked I have ever seen. She stared at me in stunned silence before stuttering, "You have to be crazy!" I think she was feeling pretty stupid after her anti-child rant in my presence since she was probably then realizing I didn't share her opinions. She kept stuttering. "Why? How? Wow. You must be.... Wow." The only thing I said to her was, "If you will think of them as blessings, they will become a blessing to you." Then after telling me I must have great patience (ha! I always get a kick out of that one!) and that she really looked up to me (sure!), she left.

And if that exchange didn't sadden me enough, I came across a terrible ad in a People magazine as I was waiting for my hair to get done. It was an ad for birth control, and they usually bother me enough, but this ad was the worst I have ever seen. The picture was of a cute curly-top little baby girl with spaghetti sauce on her face. At first glance, you'd think the ad was for baby food or maybe for a camera to catch such cute shots. But no. This child, the child herself, was the ad for birth control, with the caption "Because you're wiped out." I cannot tell you how this grieves my spirit! What has this world come to? This world that says children are brats and burdens and annoying inconveniences that no person in their right mind would WANT--much less want more than 2 or 3 of! This world that prevents and kills more children than it welcomes. This world that tries to get away from its children every chance it can get. This world that rarely has a positive word to say about their sweet babies. My heart is crying as I look around at all my beautiful precious little ones as they sleep and the thought of being without a single one is more than I can bear.

The world says, "Kids are brats".
God says, "Children are blessings...rewards...happiness is a quiver full of them!"

Today after looking at that beautiful little girl hearing over and over that she was a brat, that she was in the way, that she wasn't anything good, I have made a new resolution. I want to look at each of my children every day and tell them, "You are a blessing to me."

Our New Life

I'm sure by now you have figured out why blogging has been on the back burner. A new school year, a new baby on the way--a new baby on the way?! Yes, it has been so hard to hold it in, but my husband did not wish to announce our news until we knew if it was a boy or a girl. Yes, we know :-) So now I have told my dad which takes care of my neck of the woods, but since Kevin still hasn't told his family, I still can't say anything on Facebook, which is killing me. But since I don't think anyone from that area reads this (if you are, then don't tell!), I went ahead and announced on the blog. It feels so much better to be a little out in the open. As far as people where I live who see me, well they have been able to tell for quite a while ;-)

I have not been to the midwife yet, but yesterday I had my first ultrasound. Until yesterday I was pretty sure that I was 15 weeks with a due date of about March 7. The dates still seemed strange though since I had a very quickly positive test only a week after a very heavy and long period and was already quite tired and nauseous at what I thought was 3 weeks. I was a little suspicious that I could be farther along, but because of the bleeding and some other circumstances, I was sure it had to be right. I also started showing very soon after and my tiredness and sickness subsided long before I would have expected normally.

So finally I had the ultrasound yesterday and was shocked to learn that instead, I am 18 weeks with a due date of around February 18. Three weeks may not sound like a lot, but when you are pregnant, every week is a milestone and I just skipped three! Imagine my surprise when I saw those numbers on the screen and then within just a few seconds, the baby had it's legs completely spread eagle and my heart jumped when I very clearly saw...

...Another little boy! I had a feeling because I was kinda craving a boy :-) We all saw it and laughed and I joked that I knew having a girl had to be a fluke. We are all so thrilled and excited to know we will have a baby boy this February! And little Cara Grace will remain the princess of the family for quite a while.

We are so thankful that God has seen fit to bless our family again. Would I have planned it this way? Probably not. But I am so glad that God in His wisdom is in charge. I am not wise enough to make decisions like this. As soon as I saw that little guy wiggling around on the screen, I was reassured once again why we have left it all in His hands. How sad to have missed out on such a blessing! And in a few months I will hold him in my arms and breathe in his sweet newborn aroma and as he melds into his place in our family, I will shutter to imagine my life without him. We will love him so much our hearts will ache and give thanks to God for planning this person before time began and for giving us grace to allow Him to bless us with this baby's LIFE. May God, the creator of LIFE, be glorified through the life of this precious little one.